Wednesday, August 10, 2011

the ups & downs

The one thing we all strive for is stable levels. Most people, I think, like some kind of stability in their lives. When things are up and down and every which way, we tend to feel less in control. We tend to feel less stable.

On that note, my D has not been very stable this last week.

Apparently, I missed my endo appt. Apparently it was scheduled for July 29th. I'm not going to blame it on this, but I always get a call from my endo's office. I have never been late to or missed an appt with them. You think that if they had the time to call me later that day, after the appt., they had time to call me once they saw I was running late. I know they are not responsible for me, but still.

My conversation with the receptionist was very annoying. I explained to her that it didn't show up on my calendar and I didn't receive a call from them. She told me they have it on record that they called me and I confirmed. Um, no. I think I would remember speaking with you! She then (somewhat snootily/snottily?) said, "well, those calls are just a COURTESY, anyway." I'm sorry, but isn't it part of your job to make those calls? Don't you get paid to do that since you are doing it during your work hours? I know, I know, I probably sound like a bitch, but their office kind of annoys me in general.

I re-scheduled my appointment. I don't know if they are going to charge me for missing it.

Last week, I had a weird night of lows. I was high at bedtime and corrected...and then ran low all night. I swear I woke up every hour and ignored the vibrating and beeping of my sensor half the time. Even with a glucose tab here and there, I kept waking up low.

And then meter failed me. I did a bit of SWAGing for a bagel sandwich, and before lunch, I was 118...but still 1 unit of insulin on board, so I decided to eat a little lunch before bolusing. My sensor showed me as climbing, so going off my sensor, I kept bolusing. Is that what a rage bolus is, btw? So about 3 hours later, I feel sort of off. Meter displays a 110 and 1.5 units of insulin on board. I panic. Trusting my meter and wanting to avoid a low, I chug back some mocha mix drink and glucose tabs. Then I start to worry that I I check back in 15 min and I'm in the 230s. Hmmm, that doesn't seem right. I re-test because this situation has happened before. I'm low or trying to ward off a low, I test and show a high #, so I re-test and am actually still meter is just off for whatever reason.

So I re-test and the mid 200s and my sensor shows me shooting up. Uh-oh. Shit. Shit. Shit. Annoyed, I now bolus like crazy to get it down. Half an hour later and I'm at 300 something. My meter was WRONG...I didn't need all that extra sugar. I hate when technology fails me.

And I remain high all night because my sensor showed me dropping and stabilizing, so I didn't bolus as much when I finally ate dinner. But, that was a mistake because then IT decided to be off. This is why I don't usually bolus based off my sensor, but I thought I was feeling better and not still in the 300s. It's not much better now though...2 hours ago I was 267 and after a correction, I'm at 217 now.

See? No stability! And along with the up blood sugar comes the down emotions. I hate being high for hours, laying weak on the couch and feeling like destruction is being done to my body.


  1. Glad to know we are not the only ones who ignore the beeping and even the vibrating lol

  2. Oh yeah...if I feel fine (not shaky or sweaty), I will ignore it for a while--especially if I'm just too tired to deal with it. Sometimes, by the time my brain processes what's going on, I'm already back to sleep!

  3. i hate the up and down roller coaster exhausting. I hope that tomorrow is a much better day for you!

  4. I hear you. Mine has been a bit crazy lately too. Yesterday I went from the upper 200's down to 55. Wth.

    Hope today brings us both better blood sugars!!! :)

  5. I feel the exact same way. I've been traveling and the blood sugars have been creeping up, since I haven't had much time for exercise and meals have been pretty random and I never know exactly how many carbs I'm eating. The down emotions of being high definitely affect me. I end up snapping at people when I totally don't mean to.

  6. My CGM goes off so much at night that now I've started incorporating it into my dreams and don't wake up. My CGM fell off, so tonight I won't have it. I had spaghetti and a cupcake for dinner, so should be an interesting night for the BG. Technology offers no guarantees, but I sure do miss it when I don't have it on!!!

  7. We have been off this week too. Drives me nuts!

  8. D the drama queen. Sheesh.

    As for the office...ya know...people are human. I realize that missed appointments are an annoyance, but it's not like you're a repeat offender. Cut a girl some slack, would ya? Look at this this there's no reason to be so behind that people can't be seen at the time they SCHEDULE.

  9. things like that just send me over the edge now, with D in our lives, im like thats way too inconvenient for me to cope with. hope you 'patience' improves sometime soon. gosh thats awful those persistent lows. when R is getting hypos like that hes usually fighting an infection that is using up glucose at a rapid rate. but then we dont pump... technology failing you sucks worse than just plain old human error. hope all is well with you and that we hear from you again