Oh, hello!

It's been a while! No real reason for my blog vacation...I just sort of stopped for a while, but I have been reading YOUR wonderful blogs here and there.

I saw my endo today and my a1c is down 0.2% from 7.4 to 7.2. Not stellar, but I will still celebrate any drop--big or small! A couple years ago or less, I was closer to 6%. I try not to beat myself up too much for letting it climb back up to 8(ish)% and just focus on the fact I'm bringing it back down, slowly but surely. My endo asked me to test my ratios for breakfast, lunch and dinner, which means eating a known amount of carbs for each meal. I think I'd probably get better results with even sticking to the same meal(s) for a couple days. I don't know why I find it so hard sometimes to do these tests to make sure my ratios are right!

I also discussed with my endo how sensitive my blood sugar is to exercise--even just a 15 minute walk makes it drop! I'm dog-sitting right now and Jake, the dog, needs to be walked 2 times a day, which means I've getting at least a 20 minute walk in every day. That doesn't sound like much, but for me it is! It also feels weird to type that since I used to be an exercise fiend. Small steps, I guess.

the ups & downs

The one thing we all strive for is stable levels. Most people, I think, like some kind of stability in their lives. When things are up and down and every which way, we tend to feel less in control. We tend to feel less stable.

On that note, my D has not been very stable this last week.

Apparently, I missed my endo appt. Apparently it was scheduled for July 29th. I'm not going to blame it on this, but I always get a call from my endo's office. I have never been late to or missed an appt with them. You think that if they had the time to call me later that day, after the appt., they had time to call me once they saw I was running late. I know they are not responsible for me, but still.

My conversation with the receptionist was very annoying. I explained to her that it didn't show up on my calendar and I didn't receive a call from them. She told me they have it on record that they called me and I confirmed. Um, no. I think I would remember speaking with you! She then (somewhat snootily/snottily?) said, "well, those calls are just a COURTESY, anyway." I'm sorry, but isn't it part of your job to make those calls? Don't you get paid to do that since you are doing it during your work hours? I know, I know, I probably sound like a bitch, but their office kind of annoys me in general.

I re-scheduled my appointment. I don't know if they are going to charge me for missing it.

Last week, I had a weird night of lows. I was high at bedtime and corrected...and then ran low all night. I swear I woke up every hour and ignored the vibrating and beeping of my sensor half the time. Even with a glucose tab here and there, I kept waking up low.

And then today...my meter failed me. I did a bit of SWAGing for a bagel sandwich, and before lunch, I was 118...but still 1 unit of insulin on board, so I decided to eat a little lunch before bolusing. My sensor showed me as climbing, so going off my sensor, I kept bolusing. Is that what a rage bolus is, btw? So about 3 hours later, I feel sort of off. Meter displays a 110 and 1.5 units of insulin on board. I panic. Trusting my meter and wanting to avoid a low, I chug back some mocha mix drink and glucose tabs. Then I start to worry that I overcorrected...so I check back in 15 min and I'm in the 230s. Hmmm, that doesn't seem right. I re-test because this situation has happened before. I'm low or trying to ward off a low, I test and show a high #, so I re-test and am actually still low...my meter is just off for whatever reason.

So I re-test and same...in the mid 200s and my sensor shows me shooting up. Uh-oh. Shit. Shit. Shit. Annoyed, I now bolus like crazy to get it down. Half an hour later and I'm at 300 something. My meter was WRONG...I didn't need all that extra sugar. I hate when technology fails me.

And I remain high all night because my sensor showed me dropping and stabilizing, so I didn't bolus as much when I finally ate dinner. But, that was a mistake because then IT decided to be off. This is why I don't usually bolus based off my sensor, but I thought I was feeling better and not still in the 300s. It's not much better now though...2 hours ago I was 267 and after a correction, I'm at 217 now.

See? No stability! And along with the up blood sugar comes the down emotions. I hate being high for hours, laying weak on the couch and feeling like destruction is being done to my body.

SO mad... diabetes alert dog update

I'm SO mad, I can barely type...let me start at the beginning.

Two months ago, I decided to apply for a diabetes alert dog. There was an article in the Oregonian that prompted me, so I signed up...plus, I love dogs and don't have one of my own. The dog in my picture is my brother's dog, and while I do live with a dog (my roommate's dog), it's not my own.

I'm not sure if I should mention the company's name.

I know the dogs are in high demand, but they were training dogs for limited locations, and Oregon was one of them. Plus the dogs only cost $150. They said that it can take up to a year and they require you to go through part of the training with the dog they select for you, but that doesn't guarantee you a dog. Plus, they don't even reply when you apply for one...because they're in demand, you might not even get a response for several months. I think that when you apply for something like a dog, you SHOULD at least get a response that says we received your application, just so you know it went through.

So TODAY, I decided to randomly check the site. And. I notice. It says they are currently only placing dogs in northern and central CA. When I applied, it did not say this. Confused, I emailed them to see what was going on.

I got this response:

Valerie:

We appreciate your interest in XXX. Over the past months we have reviewed and made changes to our training program in order to continue providing the high quality assistance dogs that our clients deserve.

We realize the effect an assistance dog can have on managing diabetes and we know the need is great The value our program results from the high standards we set, both in training our dogs as well as diabetic clients.

A decision has been made to focus our services on those living in the Northern and upper Central California areas and to discontinue our two week program.

Client feedback and data assessment indicate that the most successful partnerships are created when clients attend weekly training sessions over an extended period, and attend monthly follow-up sessions. We will continue to assess our program and hope to offer other training options in the future that will once again extend our service area to Oregon.

We regret we cannot serve you at this time. Please periodically check in with us on our website. While we do not have a specific recommendation for another program, you can check the website for Assistance Dogs International (www.assistancedogsinternational.org) to see if they are able to identify an accredited service in Oregon.

Best Wishes,

XXX

WTF. They decided to change things and not NOTIFY anyone? What about all the people in Oregon and other states who applied? I never received any kind of notification about the change, and if I hadn't randomly checked their website, I would have continued waiting. I emailed them back and told them this...that I was extremely disappointed and that if I had known, I would have searched other places for an alert dog. I don't think it's fair that they didn't at LEAST notify people in Oregon and other states...and I'm sad thinking that some of those people might still be waiting for a response because they're not aware of this random change in their program.